I’m bored, so here’s a list of 25 things to do when you probably already read the title so I guess I don’t need to explain this. Unless reading titles is against your religion.
- Look away quickly.
- Nervously look around.
- Move your head without breaking eye contact.
- Wink.
- Do that finger curl thing that hot girls do to hot guys. You know the one.
- Rub your hands together, maniacally of course.
- Lick your lips.
- Unzip your pants.
- Do both.
- Scream bloody murder.
- Take a bite out of whatever you’re eating without breaking eye contact. (A hot dog would work best.)
- Say “target acquired” into your watch. Your phone would work, too.
- Stick your tongue out. That’s it. Just kind of stick it out.
- Sing a song.
- Sing a sexy song.
- Ask them to sing you a song.
- Slowly cross your eyes.
- Make a fist and then punch your other hand’s palm with said fist.
- Recite the declaration of independence.
- Start doing those weird hand things they do in Naruto.
- Read Fifty Shades of Grey to them… Ok, that’s probably a bad idea.
- Touch your chest. I don’t know why, and I don’t know which part of your chest. Wherever it would be creepiest.
- Scream “YOLO!” and physically assault them.
- Are these getting a little bit too… you know… creepy?
- And if you’re completely bat-crap crazy you could introduce yourself and have a pleasant conversation with them, who know, you might turn them into a friend.
- But go with the YOLO thing, it’s probably for the best.
Oh, and happy end of the world… I guess that happened today.