{"id":746,"date":"2012-12-21T19:21:35","date_gmt":"2012-12-22T01:21:35","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/baconstripempire.wordpress.com\/?p=746"},"modified":"2012-12-21T19:21:35","modified_gmt":"2012-12-22T01:21:35","slug":"25-things-to-do-when-you-make-eye-contact-with-a-stranger","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/reimer.haus\/bse\/25-things-to-do-when-you-make-eye-contact-with-a-stranger\/","title":{"rendered":"25 Things To Do When You Make Eye Contact With A Stranger"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I\u2019m bored, so here\u2019s a list of 25 things to do when you probably already read the title so I guess I don\u2019t need to explain this. Unless reading titles is against your religion.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Look away quickly.<\/li>\n<li>Nervously look around.<\/li>\n<li>Move your head without breaking eye contact.<\/li>\n<li>Wink.<\/li>\n<li>Do that finger curl thing that hot girls do to hot guys. You know the one.<\/li>\n<li>Rub your hands together, maniacally of course.<\/li>\n<li>Lick your lips.<\/li>\n<li>Unzip your pants.<\/li>\n<li>Do both.<\/li>\n<li>Scream bloody murder.<\/li>\n<li>Take a bite out of whatever you\u2019re eating without breaking eye contact. (A hot dog would work best.)<\/li>\n<li>Say \u201ctarget acquired\u201d into your watch. Your phone would work, too.<\/li>\n<li>Stick your tongue out. That\u2019s it. Just kind of stick it out.<\/li>\n<li>Sing a song.<\/li>\n<li>Sing a sexy song.<\/li>\n<li>Ask them to sing you a song.<\/li>\n<li>Slowly cross your eyes.<\/li>\n<li>Make a fist and then punch your other hand\u2019s palm with said fist.<\/li>\n<li>Recite the declaration of independence.<\/li>\n<li>Start doing those weird hand things they do in Naruto.<\/li>\n<li>Read Fifty Shades of Grey to them\u2026 Ok, that\u2019s probably a bad idea.<\/li>\n<li>Touch your chest. I don\u2019t know why, and I don\u2019t know which part of your chest. Wherever it would be creepiest.<\/li>\n<li>Scream \u201cYOLO!\u201d and physically assault them.<\/li>\n<li>Are these getting a little bit too\u2026 you know&#8230; creepy?<\/li>\n<li>And if you\u2019re completely bat-crap crazy you could introduce yourself and have a pleasant conversation with them, who know, you might turn them into a friend.<\/li>\n<li>But go with the YOLO thing, it\u2019s probably for the best.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Oh, and happy end of the world\u2026 I guess that happened today.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I\u2019m bored, so here\u2019s a list of 25 things to do when you probably already read the title so I guess I don\u2019t need to explain this. Unless reading titles is against your religion. Look away quickly. Nervously look around. Move your head without breaking eye contact. Wink. Do that finger curl thing that hot&hellip;<\/p>\n<p><a class=\"more-link\" href=\"https:\/\/reimer.haus\/bse\/25-things-to-do-when-you-make-eye-contact-with-a-stranger\/\" title=\"Continue reading &lsquo;25 Things To Do When You Make Eye Contact With A Stranger&rsquo;\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[2,4],"tags":[93,457],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/reimer.haus\/bse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/746"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/reimer.haus\/bse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/reimer.haus\/bse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/reimer.haus\/bse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/reimer.haus\/bse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=746"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/reimer.haus\/bse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/746\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/reimer.haus\/bse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=746"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/reimer.haus\/bse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=746"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/reimer.haus\/bse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=746"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}